Except for some brief moments, in the life before the lockdown, I never thought about the kind of life that I was living. I seldom thought deeply about what my purpose could be in life. I dealt with life each day and as it came to me. Life never seemed to pace me, and I always had the resources and time to find out what to do.
But now, having spent 23 years becoming the person that I am today, I find myself devoid of the resources and energy to move ahead. Goals and targets either seem too futile or greater than my imagination to even work on.
Before starting on the quest to know the purpose in life, there are certain things that I need to get clear. Is my purpose in life a way to deep self-fulfillment and joy or is it another way of serving society and the people? And are these two even exclusives? Isn’t life itself a quest to find purpose? Is my job a way to fulfill my purpose?
I work as a full-time consultant but I do not feel fulfilled at the job. It doesn’t make me a joyous person. Anxiety and worry crop up when I think about the job at hand and any mistake that I might be making at it. Things like gardening and writing that I do in my free time, make me feel joyous and relaxed. Not only do I feel completely present at the moment while doing those things, but I also look forward to spending my time taking care of my plants or writing about my experiences in life.
Since gardening is something that I have recently taken up, let’s discuss my relationship with the job of writing. In the younger years, life didn’t make me reflect a lot on things and so, I didn’t write. Some years back, I developed the skill of writing. I wrote on topics that were new and interesting. I gathered information about things that the world was unaware of and presented it in a well-written piece.
But recently, life has presented me with an abundance of time to think and reflect. I think about how our actions create an impact and how they in the first place are a manifestation of our thoughts. And I intend to write about them. Writing down my thoughts feels like unbraiding my emotions and uncovering the message that they carry for me. I intend to do it for as long as it brings me clarity of thoughts and action.
Looking at my quality of life and the types of jobs that I have spent my life doing, I have come to the understanding that, our work, for all practical reasons, should be something that brings us peace and bliss and makes us a more joyous person. Our work should gravitate us towards life and fill us up with gratitude for life.
Looking at my quality of life and the types of jobs that I have spent my life doing, I have come to the understanding that, our work, for all practical reasons, should be something that brings us peace and bliss and makes us a more joyous person. Our work should gravitate us towards life and fill us up with gratitude for life.
But the religious leader, Osho says that our jobs aren’t our purpose in life. We may be a carpenter or painters or corporate employees but our purpose in life is not fulfilled by our jobs. Our purpose in life is something more than our job. It is unique to us and it makes us irreplaceable.
We are also unique beings and so is our purpose in life. Is there a connection? Yes.
Osho says that the way to know our purpose in life is to know ourselves. Knowing ourselves will at once bring the knowledge of our purpose to ourselves.
But we do know ourselves, don’t we? I know my age and my physical features. I know if I am a kind person or not, I know which things pique my curiosity and I also know what my emotional state is.
I know myself by the facts about me, I know myself by concepts. I may be able to describe myself, but when asked who am I? The realization dawned upon me that it is a complete mystery.
It is startling that even after so much information is now available to us at our fingertips, we have so shallow understanding of ourselves.
It is startling that even after so much information is now available to us at our fingertips, we have so shallow understanding of ourselves.
What is the key then? How do we know ourselves?
The answer is meditation. Meditation brings to us the ability to experience things more clearly prior to concepts.
It is the state of observing our thoughts and seeing them separate from our being. Meditation is not limited to but is a training of the mind to be able to experience things with more consciousness.
With consciousness comes a knowing.
When we are uncertain about making a decision, the first approach is to ask others for opinions. This is the external means of knowing i.e. researching and polling. The decisions made by this method often include the conditioning to please others. The other method is to look inside and know what our inner self wants. Meditation helps us do exactly that.
Looking inside us gives us an opportunity to assess if the life that we have created for us is what we actually yearn for.
Initially, when somebody starts to meditate, all kinds of thoughts rush into the mind and they don’t let a person sit at peace. Embrace those thoughts, don’t become fidgety. First, try to feel the impact the thought has on you, and then try to observe your thoughts from a distance instead of directly coming under their impact.
The focus should not be on controlling your thoughts or directing them in any direction, flow in the direction that it takes you and look at them from a distance.
After practicing for some 10-minutes sessions over weeks, you may recognize a deeper level within you. A level that you may not have known even existed.
All this level, all kinds of voices are silenced. You cannot even hear your voice. If you pose a question to yourself at this time then a knowing comes. A nudge pushes you to the next right thing and a warm feeling fills your body.
When you begin to look inwards while making a decision, you begin a life that is truer to your inner self and that I think is the subjective path to knowing our purpose in life.
Consider making mindfulness and meditation a part of your life to reap the benefits. Nobody is perfect, the aim is to get better at ‘doing’ life. As long as you do it consistently, even a few minutes count.
I have mentioned below a list of resources that I have personally benefitted from to start and continue the journey of meditation:
The app ‘Waking Up’
Guided meditation sessions by Sam Harris
Ted talk on stress management by Meditation
Ted talk on 'How Meditation Changed my Life'