The irony of the feeling of loneliness is that it is a very universal feeling. Everyone has been lonely sometime in their life and hence we know how the feeling plays games with our minds. Loneliness gets us to believe that people care much less than they actually do. That belief makes reaching out and seeking help even more difficult.
A particular thought that looped over my head during a phase of life when I felt particularly lonely was that with the power of social media, every person I have ever known has the ability to contact me at any moment and yet they choose not to. I have realized that this kind of thinking is irrational but that doesn’t guarantee that I won’t feel this way again in the future.
With the increased involvement of social media in our lives, we have given a lot of power to the hands of billionaires who manage the working of huge social media companies. But am I the only one who feels that social media has a role to play in the increasing number of people complaining of loneliness?
Social media was initially meant to create a community of people who are like-minded and be a place where people can get inspiration by sharing thoughts, opinions, and ideas.
But with its addictive nature, people have begun preferring scrolling the feed on social media over real-life activities.
It is not definitive if social media is causing people to feel lonely but research shows that socially anxious and lonely people tend to use social media to compensate for their social fear.
In the words of Anthony Silard, an Associate Professor at the Luiss Business School in Rome, “In some ways, social media is like calling the delivery number of a pizza franchise in your neighborhood. The more frequently you order, the fatter and less capable of walking outside to a grocery store or restaurant you become”.
People who indulge in problematic use of social media do so mainly because they have the fear of being judged and misunderstood by people. Things get tricky because people postpone facing their fears and choose the more convenient option of connecting online. Connecting on social media makes people think that they’re making up for face-to-face interaction. In the long run, it keeps people devoid of the real connection that comes from meeting people and opening up. It is also found that people who engage passively on social media like mindlessly scrolling through the feed are more prone to social comparisons and envy.
The key then is to use social media for what it’s made, to enhance the opportunities for social interaction and not replace them. Sharing our activities on social media will be fun and harmless only if we have a really good time doing those activities in real life. People we meet online and the connections we build on the internet will be meaningful only when they are not an compensation of our real-life connections.